“Our children will fail to obey.
Our goal is not to produce perfect obedience,
but to provide regular demonstration that sin has consequences.”
I read this quotation here (in an excellent article on the relationship between obedience and love) and it made me realize that sometimes my goal is perfect obedience. I want my children to be perfect. It would definitely make my life easier. It would lead to less stress when I’m trying to fix dinner if they could just be perfect and not fight over the inflatable football. It would make me look so good at church when they’ve gotten their coats on and I’m in the process of putting on mine or when I’m talking to someone. Instead they zoom off across the narthex, sometimes loud but always fast. It would help me not feel like a broken record when I say, “Don’t step on your books. Take your hand out of your mouth. Give that back to your sister.” So, yes, my imperfect self desires perfection from my children.
What a reminder, then, that perfection is not even truly possible in this sin-cursed world. I will fall, fail, break down. So will they. The goal is not perfection. When they fail, I am to bring them God’s long-suffering, loving-kindness, best-interest punishment, and restoring forgiveness and mercy. The goal is a relationship with God, letting love motivate our obedience.
I beat myself up over my own failings. My lack of consistency. My anger. My selfishness. But God does not expect perfection from me, either. He remembers that I am made of dust, that I need Him every day. He chastens me because He loves me. Just as I do (or try to do) for my children.
“Faithful are the wounds of a friend.”
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